Thursday, September 27, 2012

all i wanna do is zoom zoom zoom

and crochet.
it must be fall.

Tuesday, September 25, 2012

differences between being a mom and being a dad

all come down to this...

yes, yes i am where you think i am.  and i am having a life changing conversation about goals.  why this couldn't wait until i was done, who knows?  i remember cornering my mom the same way.

tony, on the other hand, gets peace and quiet and solitude and a sign. 

Monday, September 24, 2012

never say never :: the running edition

never would i have thought that i would run a half marathon.
like, never-never.
here is my running history in 50 words...
i "ran" track.  big quotes on the run. i socialized and ran whatever race didn't have a body to fill it.  i didn't like it and it didn't like me. i ran for a brief 6 weeks while pregnant with aidan. my timing sucks. in 2008 i ran 2 blocks.

and then my nani b started girls on the run. annnnnnd then my friend karen said, 'hey, i know what will be fun! let's run a half marathon in september'.  annnnnnd then my friend lindsay said, 'i'll run bright and early in the morning even!'  annnnnnnd then there was jenn and jen getting their run on and encouraging me, probably without even realizing it.

and that is how my never turned into a what did i get myself into. 

i almost didn't sign up.  i had a million reasons not to.  but all of these amazing women kept saying i was capable.  my 11th hour coach sara basically said if i didn't register she would register me herself, and then she said she would make her husband run with me. (i let him off the hook) and of course there was tony telling me i was ready and he is really smart so it is hard not to buy into what he's saying.  i sorta started believing them all.

and that is how i went from what did i get myself into holy hellsbells i'm standing at the starting line with a dang chip strapped to my ankle and my knees shaking so hard i look like i am running in place without leaving the ground. 

but i did it. 

Thursday, September 20, 2012

made my ever loving day

i was running,
and running,
and trying hard to run the nerves out of me,
and not running very far or very fast or even uphill, but man was i struggling.
struggling and feeling scatterbrained.

outta nowhere this guy drives by, rolls down his window and gives me a simple thumbs up. 

i take the 'share the road' relationship with motorists, walkers, cyclists, the occasional teeth-barred dog, very seriously.  when a car slows just a titch and scoots close to the middle, i give them a smile and little wave.  if a car crosses the yellow line to give me a wide berth, i smile ear to ear and give them the biggest wave i can manage.  when i'm doing the what-side-you-gonna-pass-on tango with a cyclists, you better believe i'm happy to jump off the path if i can just so they can avoid tackweeds.  the occasional motorist who yells encouragement out the window (i choose to believe it is all positive) might even get a giggle. 

but this guy, i wish i could have gotten a picture of his red truck with a wheel chair slung in the back and his thumbs up out the window.

like i said, he made my ever loving day.  i hope he knows it.

Wednesday, September 19, 2012

even with my brightside

you know that kelly clarkson song, even with my dark side?  i have been feeling that creep in and out, in and out, in and out of my days lately. 

tony has had atypical meetings last week and this week.  they could have -and did at first- put him in a gnarly mood.  then he decided to just learn something, anything, from the experience.
just like that. 
he changed his outlook and wha-bam ---better mood, giggly husband, playful dad.
so this morning when i drove away from home thinking about how much i'd rather be there than anywhere else, i decided to take a page from tony's book. 

i thought about how lovely it was that nadia made me a special snack last night.
and about the dance she put on.
and about the lecture on the importance of taking school seriously.
and about our special girl time when tony and aidan go to scouts.

and i thought about how thankful i was that i decided to play battleship with aidan while i cooked dinner.
i so badly wanted to tell him i was too busy.  i wanted to explain that i was tired from working all day and still had a list of stuff to do around the house.  and i might have too, but i couldn't say no to that face.  he kicked my booty too.  even that was worth it. 

and i saw this in my rear view mirror and decided to learn something today. 
i watched as car after car past with grumpypuss faces, their darksides showing.
maybe my learnin' for today is to let my brightside outshine the dark? 

Thursday, September 13, 2012

all better

i sulked a little yesterday.  ok, a lot.  stupid hormones i am sure. i watched trashy tv.  sanded the trim around the backdoor and repainted it.  got a neck rub from nadia and lots and lots of sympathy from tony and aidan let me pull a tooth.  friends reached out with kind words.  family called to make me smile.

and poof. 

funky-funky-not-so-fresh mood was gone.

and i didn't even resort to brownie-ice cream-goodness. 

i just waited for the squirrels to come rescue me from my bad mood.

and i came to the realization that i just a little nuts.

Wednesday, September 12, 2012


it is probably just from being tired.
or nerves about doing something new. 
or the changing season.
or schedule changes.
or lack of exercise.
or lack of a brownie in my mouth this very second, preferably smothered in ice cream.

or because i miss her
but i am feeling just a little blue today.

Wednesday, September 5, 2012

plum tuckered

this new schedule it taken some getting used to. 
for me for sure.
for her, most definitely.

she spilled some big 'ol cleansing tears this morning.  all because i asked her to clean her fingernails. 

let's talk about fingernails for a moment.  i still wince at the thought of mine being cut.  my mom told me at a young age that i had pretty hands and from then on i cherished my long nails.  as the youngest, nails were a great way to get back at my biting sister or my brother who sat on my head more than once and let it rip...until my brother lured me to the neighbors out of earshot of my parents and cut them all off.  don't you worry your pretty little head about my nails though.  i grew them back with a vengeance and in my teen years convinced my dad that doing the dishes would ruin them.  somehow i managed to get out of dishes from the age of 14 until about 22.  nails can mean a lot to a girl.

back to my tired little girl.

while cleaning her nails, tears rolling down her sweet little cheeks the whole time, she confessed that she was really upset because her hands are just so pink.  "why mom, why do they have to be so pink? no one else has fingers this pink?  NO ONE!!!!!! it just isn't fair.  pink mom!  PINK!!!"

poor little thing.  its a good thing she is easy to console.  some hugs and loves and a little hand washing and she was good as new. 
it stinks being so plum tuckered that nothing becomes everything and so little sets you into a tailspin.  so we took the night off.  lazed around and i pretty much let her call the shots.  i didn't even complain when she wanted to give me a spa, painting my nails and everything. 

Tuesday, September 4, 2012

after school special

and before school special...

and during school special...
and back to school special...

because school is special, right?  it is so special that i have decided to spend my adult life living it up at school.  i love learning.  i love books.  i love tabs and folders and post its.  i love conversation.  i love-love-love pens in an array of colors.  and i love little notes that help us remember to make the most of every day.

and i especially love that these two get to go to school and love those things too. 

it is 5th grade for him...

and 4th grade for her...

and six sections of tenth graders again this year for me...