How did we get from there to here? I ask myself this often. I shouldn't question it, really, because I could not have asked for someone who embodies the word partner more. Today I am thankful beyond measure for the ten years of marriage to my one true love and can't help buy reminisce. Take a walk with me down memory lane...
Year one- ahh the newlywed phase. since we had been dating for six years, there wasn't much we didn't know about each other. tony knew that i was neurotic about the dishes and silverware placement and lousy about putting my sweaters & shoes away. i knew he was hyper at night and predisposed to having project after project, even if that meant construction projects in our apartment dining room. we moved from pullman to bellingham (with a layover in dayton and then puerto vallarta to get hitched) in the span of a month. throw in tony's graduation and first engineering job and me with the new found obsession of creating intricate vacuum lines on the carpet and you can picture our first few months as husband and wife. eventually i had a job of my own, working nights at a homeless shelter so we learned to make the most of the moments we had. sundays were lazy. the rain was brutal. the town had an oddly comforting smell of burned coffee and ham. and the winter brought a cravings of cucumbers and donuts that by spring became a baby-bump.
Year two- all things Aidan. our life revolved around this little life. gone were the days of sleeping in until noon then lounging in bed the rest of the day reading the paper and eating donuts. to think of it, gone were the days of sleep. and our bed. i slept on the couch with Aidan nuzzled under my chin, tony took up camp on the floor beside us. the donuts remained. in march we were off to a new adventure, back to the tri-cities. we learned quickly that the love of our little family takes precedence over all other things.
Year three- the light of new jobs and a new mortgage were to be quickly dimmed by a new craving, this time tomatoes and mcdonalds. small complications from a surgery for Aidan showed us that our love is fierce, for each him and for each other, and if i ever need someone in my corner, you better believe i have the best of the best in my husband. family gatherings, home improvement and AFV dotted the year.
Year four- just barely into the fourth year brings our sweet little Nadia. it also brought the balancing act of man on man defense, classical music to thwart off mid-night wakings, stretching patience and stretching waistbands. mostly it brought on a hum of equilibrium, we were us- insular, whole, family. we were just gearing up.
Year five- graduate school and a layoff were the biggies. i learned that sometimes i don't need to talk to tell someone i believe in them, that i love them. sometimes i need to listen for them to know. sometimes i need a gentle reminder of that. we grew closer than ever before during the hardships of that year and learned that it is easier to rebound when you have the momentum of a partner.
Year six- it is funny how the first five years just came to me. each distinct with the ups and downs and the growth. year six was a year of routine. a year of health. a (gasp) name tattoo. a new job for me. continued success at a family friendly job for tony. friendships deepened, pace picked up and life marched on.
Year seven- a year of making dreams a reality. together we have grown in our love of creating. i have learned that a project can still be fun, even if it takes longer than an hour. tony (i think) has learned that the beauty is in the finishing, not in the planning. mostly we began our long, arduous climb up the learning curve of compromise. it wasn't until we began to bring our grand ideas together did we know how alike we are in our priorities, but we also didn't know how different we are in our processing.
Year eight- this brought another move, another move and many more projects. it brought the term schmegal because saying i love you just wasn't enough anymore. i am certain that it was along in here that i started to wonder when it fades. when would i stop feeling like i am going to burst with love. when would i stop thinking that i couldn't wait to tell tony about the days happenings. wasn't it suppose to get old by now? the year brought calm in our relationship while it began a year of chaos in our professional lives.
Year nine- year 9, the year work tried to eat us alive. no matter, we had each other.
Year ten- smooth. tranquil. satisfying. serene. comforting. level. busy still, but a year of give and take. a year of priorities in order more often than not. a year of family. a year for us to open up even more to each other, (if that is even possible). a year of i got this. he's got this. with each other it seems as if we will always have 'this'. Together.
Welcome to the next ten- i have high hopes that in today, on our tenth anniversary, we will continue to grow with each other. we will continue to appreciate each other. we will continue to schmegal because the word love just doesn't hold enough. i couldn't want for more. i wouldn't want anyone else by my side. in the words of the comic book guy, thank you my love for the 'best decade ever'.