Sunday, May 29, 2011

a little farm livin'



remind me to tell you about growing up with a bunch of sheep sometime...
the good
the baaaaaaad
and the ugly.
i will try to keep the swearing to a minimum. 

Thursday, May 26, 2011


you're a bunch of weirdos too, right?

Monday, May 23, 2011

the better 1/2

it is official... tony and i have been together for longer than we have lived apart. 

!!!corny-cheesy-lovey-dovey-sappy-post warning!!!

it was those long waits in his sister's mustang that brought us together.  those waits, english class and maybe a smidgen of fate. we became the best of friends, hung out at his house to watch movies and even went to prom.  he told my bff that he had given up on us dating because apparently flipping my well curled super red hair at regular intervals and spending every other minute with him was not enough of a clue to let him know i was interested too.  thankfully that same friend clued me in and one phone call later (not to mention tony delivering a cheesy one liner from top gun) and we have been together ever since.  i kept rehearsing in my mind that i needed to remember every single moment of that first kiss. 

if you knew us then you might remember that we both had a lot more hair.  (and darn it all...i can't find one picture of how ridiculous we looked!) we spent hours and hours riding his old blue thunder (ummm hey you, creepo- that is not a euphemism.  blue thunder was the name of his 1985 ford ranger). we spent his mcdonald's check at the movies nearly every weekend.  we talked for hours on the phone even though we lived next door to each other.  we endured helpful advice from friends and family when we ended up at different colleges and then at the same college (go cougs!), living apart and shacking up (sorry dad).  and it has all been better together.

it probably shouldn't have worked.  it is not perfect, and it won't ever be.  it isn't easy and if it was then how would we learn about ourselves?  i often feel like a hypocrite when i shake my head at my high school students who tell me how they have their lives all planned out with the love of their life that they have been with like forever, you know, since 11th grade.  when we are asked why it does work all i can think is that i am lucky enough to have married my best friend.  ok, it is more complicated than that...
we value the same things,
we are lucky to grow together,
we have a similar sense of humor,
we talk things out - even when it means someone has to apologize,
we are nice to each other,
we make certain to say why we appreciate each other,
we are an awesome team...
and we really like being together, you know? 

so, i think we will go for another 17 about it tony?

meow mix

i can't believe i have not written about this!

it is like the most exciting thing in my life!

ok- so maybe not THE most exciting thing but come on!


but wait there is more...i didn't even have to make any promises this time.  tony -all on his own, without any prompting- told aidan and nadia that they could each pick out a kitten from my mom's pile 'o kitties. 
[by the by, my parents only have one cat, pickle.  their neighbor has a ton of cats that have babies at regular intervals and sometimes the mamas get smart and move down the road where their is less chaos and kind hearted people.  members of my family, tony and i included, have been known to spay and neuter strays if possible]  anywho.....
back to KITTENS!

aren't they so cute?

this is acrobat. 
he is fiesty and ferocious.
and he is nadia's.

this is eclipse.
she is reserved and a little lopsided.
she always climbs up on my shoulders...
and sometimes on my head.
she is all aidan's.

don't you just want to snuggle their little faces?

 and dangle a little yarn for them to attack?
and watch them tackle each other?

and i know you want one of your very own,
don't you?

Sunday, May 15, 2011

reflections of a boarderline stagemom


 last week the missoula children's theater came to our beloved elementary, angelou.  they swoop in, hold an audition on monday for an hour long production, hold rehearsals way past dinner time and have opening night that friday (shortly followed by closing night saturday morning).  our play was king arthur's quest and let me tell you they had a stellar cast.  many a fine young actor performed.  some of my all time favorites under 12 let their inner thespian shine. 

can i just say that it was stressful?  amazing and a learning experience and fantastic to see our kids up there rocking that stage, but seriously stressful all the same.  and yes i realize that it was me who got all nagg-y with aidan about his lines when he would have been fine without my added pressure.  i was the one quizzing nadia about her posture and presence-again, none of that mattered. and i certainly invited every family member within a 57 mile radius and then didn't give up my front row seat for them- not cool stage-mom-mel, not cool- and yes it was me that brought a video camera, my camera and whipped out my cell phone to capture their moments.  i own up to sitting on the floor and making tony do the same so we could get better shots.  and yes i flashed the children my goofiest smiles so they would smile back and of course i laughed too loudly at every scene.  but they were fantastic despite my crazy stagemommy-ness. 
what a patient man

Friday, May 13, 2011

eleven years with my love

i only slept for 90 minutes the night before our wedding.  it wasn't nerves that kept sleep at bay.  it felt completely natural to be marrying you, my very best friend.  i could see our future quite clearly.  i knew there would be children down the path, and pets and mortgages and ups and downs and i knew that we would be there to grow with each other and how excited i was that we would be there to dream with each other.

i was quite ready for the ride.

i wasn't worried at how the day would play out.  i didn't have any preconceptions about perfection. your friends and family would be there to straighten potted pansies and string lights.  my sister would be there to drive like a maniac to get me to the fairgrounds on brother would be there to blow in my eyes when they got misty.   monique would be there in the wee hours of that night so i wouldn't have to fret alone.  my mom and dad would be there to make sure people were well fed. the white benches would be filled with people who drove miles and miles for us and filled with crazy college boys who didn't have qualms about changing in your parents front yard. and all would be ready to celebrate the 2 1/2 minute ceremony with dance and drink. 

and you would be there, by my side. 

what kept me awake was a whole lot of silliness about hair appointments.  really! a silly, silly hair appointment that didn't define you or me or they family we would build.  silliness, that in the grand scheme of things, didn't matter one iota.  and eleven years later there are still things that try to work there way into us, but those eleven years have taught us that we are like bread and butter...
or like a wink and a smile...
or like moulder and scully...
or like m&m's and popcorn...
or like steel! 

did you know that the 11 anniversary is traditionally celebrated with steel?  

think about it... by ourselves we are great, but put us together and we are stronger.  together we are capable of greater things. 

together we are shinier!  i crack myself up!

i love you tony.  happy anniversary.   

Monday, May 9, 2011

not the monday i had planned

i have been sitting in the same hard rocking chair for the past five hours.  it has to be the most uncomfortable rocking chair on earth.  i am listening to the twangy twang twang of 80's, 90's and early 2000's country.  my ears are not bleeding...yet.  there are half drank bottles of gaterade and 7up in the no-food-zone.  i haven't wanted to change a bit of it.   

in the wee hours of the morning nadia woke me up by gently shaking me to tell me she threw up.  such sad, sad, loaded words.  she lead me to the bathroom where she had smartly barfed in the toilet.  i laid the requisite towel across her pillow, gave her a bowl and rubber her belly.  when her lids started to sag i went back to bed to figure out how to juggle the day if her dinner made another reappearance...

it did.  repeatedly.  like 15 times...

i could have used this time catching up on some work that i need to get done or uploading pictures from king arthurs quest, or finishing the banner that my dad requested, cleaned up a little... i probably should have done those things but...

all she wants is for me to hold her and so that is what i am doing.  i wouldn't wish for her to be sick.  especially since it sounds like she is an old beat up farm truck horkin up a squawking turkey.  seriously, if you have ever heard one- and i have not except in my sleep deprived mind - you would agree.
i really wouldn't wish that on anyone, but i have SO enjoyed snuggling my nani-b.
and to think of it, i wouldn't have planned a different monday at all.   
nadia- bpf (before puke fest, that is)

Sunday, May 8, 2011

happy mother's day...

thank you for making the world go 'round!

Thursday, May 5, 2011

that kind of girl

there i was, checking some grades for some squirrel-y 4th hour crazies and counting down the minutes to the magical lunch bell at 12:04, when in walked a ray of sunshine with her two littlest rays close behind, carrying a toteful of homemade deliciousness. 


this glorious gourmet gal brought us lunch.  not just any lunch, but spinach and pasta salad with her own signature dressing, fresh baked bread and dessert that was pretending to be raspberry jam.  who does this?  who brings their friends a home cooked masterpiece to celebrate teacher appreciation week when they don't even have kids at that school?  only a truly giving, truly talented and truly fantastic friend would do that.  only someone like karen...

thank you KAREN!


Tuesday, May 3, 2011

i felt it

i felt it this morning.

my route to work and my lovelies’ school has me circling up road 68 and down road 100.

as i faced east on the 3rd leg i felt it.
the sun washed over my face and neck, its warmth soaking into my skin.
my periphery was drenched in green leaves and the tiniest of white blossoms. there it was.

nothing left to lose was coming through the speakers. as the lines
Come on and we'll sing, like we were free
Push the pedal down watch the world around fly by us
rang out, i felt it.

it resonated within me. it kept my belt clasped tight around me as i lined up with light post #30, parking in my usual spot. it held me there when normally i would be scrambling to set everything straight and head in.

spring was there, wrapped about me.  that old familiar spring fever was racing through me, quickening my heartbeat. my fingers pulsed, ready to back out of that spot, gather my babes and see where the road takes us.

.....and then wham! a certain student popped up beside my window waving and yelling hello!!!

i was this close i tell you...this close...